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    Monday, March 28, 2022

    Reviewing the Elite (3/23/22): Mom! TK Booked the Wrong Main Event Again!


    What exactly is Tony Khan's problem with main events?

    While I do appreciate how I have yet to encounter a bad Dynamite episode and only a couple of ones worth nitpicking, one thing that really grinds my gears is his refusal to close out the show with the best match possible. From booking a five-star classic as an opener to ending the night with a humdrum match, TK is just needlessly stubborn when arranging his card. I get that hot-shotting things can be exciting at times, but it doesn't work sixty percent of the time. At the end of the day, you still need some sort of structure to deliver consistently good rasslin' on a weekly basis.

    Case in point: this week's whatever main event. It wasn't even that bad. I just didn't get why it was a tag team match. What's the use of showing us an old photo of Chris Jericho and John Silver? Shouldn't they have just booked Chris Jericho vs. John Silver then? Johnny Hungee decimating every member of Inner Circle 2.0 was the match's highlight anyway. Not that I don't want to see Daniel Garcia get a win for once, but why was this the main event when you have Jeff Hardy and motherfucking Sting over here flying around like they're not above the 40-year mark? C'mon, TK!

    Who in their right mind would put this chaotically match second? Tony Khan, that's who. Put some respect on the Hardy Boyz' name! I saw Jeff Hardy hitting a Swanton from a freaking wall on Instagram before watching this week's show, and I thought, holy shit, this is one hell of a main event! Darby Allin even fell down a concrete stairway telenovela style. Is he still alive? Private Party also got their licks in as they sent their former mentor Matt Hardy straight through a stack of tables via a double Side Effect. This match was crazy fun, and I'm still pissed this didn't get the respect it deserved. 

    And when you start a show with CM Punk vs. Dax Harwood, a match that had no business being this good, then you can't blame me for expecting a main event even bigger than this. This is hot-shotting done right, people. I was pretty sure Punk's appearance this week was just going to be a segment where he calls out the AEW World Champion, and while I would've enjoyed a CM Punk promo, getting this PPV-quality opener is always a welcome trade-off. And I don't care how random it is—a babyface FTR run already looks great. I can't wait to see them wipe the floor with the Ass Boys next week. 

    Hell, even Jon Moxley, Bryan Danielson, and William Regal officially establishing themselves as the Blackpool Combat Club was far more important than this week's main event. I'm also glad they let Moxley take the lead with this specific promo. It definitely required a commanding yet sinister tone, something the former AEW World Champion exudes like it's nothing. I'm not sure about the name, though. It doesn't sound intimidating, probably because it has the word "club" in it. It just doesn't match the intensity of this faction, you know? That's just an opinion, Mr. Regal. Please don't slap me. 

    I really hope Tony Khan figures out how to arrange his card better because this week's episode could've been a lot better with just a few adjustments to the match order. It's not like I'm asking for a lot here—just arrange your matches better! Stop ignoring the importance of having a strong main event in your weekly shows. I get that it's important to have a good first hour to keep more eyeballs glued, but don't forget to reward their attention and patience with a satisfying end. This ain't rocket science, TK.

    Show Grade: C+ 

    Dynamite Debris That Look Sadder than Julia Hart with an Eyepatch

    • So let me get this straight: MJF's punishment for Wardlow is not suing him for every dollar he has or kicking him and his family out of their home, but a paid vacation? I can't with this storyline. Let's wait and see if this storyline can sink lower in quality next week.

    • Speaking of dumb, did Adam Page forget that he was already carrying a heavier diamond-studded belt before he took off his regular belt? That made no literal sense at all. I didn't know babyfaces in AEW also love looking like jackasses. At least his pants didn't drop during the scuffle. Stupid. 

    • I don't really get the outrage with Sammy Guevara and Tay Conti getting it on while wearing the TNT Championship. This segment was awesome! It's satisfying to shut Dan Lambert up, and I can't believe it was Sammy Guevara who did it. That wasn't even the title that's supposed to honor the late Brodie Lee. If this was offensive, I'm pretty sure Amanda Huber wouldn't allow this segment to air. So maybe chill out a bit? Some of y'all are just way too single, and it shows. 

    • I really thought I would hate yet another Leyla Hirsch vs. Red Velvet rematch, but this was actually a fun watch. The finish was clever as well, with it ending via a stunt Eddie Guerrero would be proud of. Now give us Leyla Hirsch vs. Goth Kris Statlander already. We've been waiting for months!


    *****

    Ricky Publico (@nyamnyamgarbage) is Smark Henry's seasoned veteran and resident Dynamite reviewer. He's a sucker for well-written promos and fast-paced matches. While he enjoys nitpicking shows, he now prefers enjoying wrestling for what it is instead of stressing himself over things he can't control. He's anxious about the future, now more than ever. His potential haunts him.

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    Item Reviewed: Reviewing the Elite (3/23/22): Mom! TK Booked the Wrong Main Event Again! Rating: 5 Reviewed By: Ricky Jay Publico
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