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    Tuesday, June 16, 2020

    #ThemeSongTuesday: Hey! Hey Hey.


    On last week's SmackDown, Miz & Morrison (HEY HEY! HO HO!) teased their brand new music video, which they dropped at Backlash yesterday... at least until Braun Strowman crashed the party and promptly dispatched of them during their 2-on-1 Universal Championship match.

    Thankfully, WWE released it in its full glory on its WWEMusic channel and now I can say we've truly been blessed with another Miz & Morrison original. As a mark for anything from John Morrison (fka Johnny Mundo, Johnny Impact, Johnny Survivor, Johnny Blaze—yeah, you get it), then you can bet your sweet ass it deserves a #ThemeSongTuesday feature.


    Their new music video is for the song "Hey! Hey Hey." Yeah, not the best title, but we don't watch Miz & Morrison music videos for the creativity in their titles, do we?

    The entire thing is a parody of an 80s power ballad, which had me hooked right from the get-go. You hear it in the synth keys playing in the intro and you see it in the filter and the aspect ratio, which should remind you of MTV, back when it was actually about music on television. The first few seconds feature the Greatest Tag Team of the 21st Century posing pensively over superimposed images of Morrison playing the piano, cutting to a split-screen shot of our heroes dramatically putting on their shades. The cheese!

    It doesn't sound like somebody else was hired to sing the song, so I'm going to go ahead and assume that WWEMusic actually went with Miz & Morrison's real vocals, plus a little bit of autotune. If that's the case, then that's the harmonic blending in the intro's actually pretty good! And then we get to the actual song, where Johnny Drip-Drip and MC M.I.Z. take alternate singing their lines, ultimately building up to the hook, which their dulcet tones kill.

    What makes "Hey! Hey Hey." epic is its lyrics because they sound like they were written by a petty 12-year-old. Don't believe me? Check out these zingers.

    [Verse 1]
    Braun Strowman best be watching his back
    Gonna put the boots to his big ass
    'Cause nobody likes him, neither do we
    Braun's hands and beard smells like cheese

    [Pre-Chorus]
    Send him a tweet and let him know
    You want a new champ on the show

    [Chorus]
    Hey! Hey hey! Ho ho!
    The Universal Champion needs to go
    Hey! Hey hey!
    Braun wet the bed until he was six years old
    Hey! Hey hey! Ho ho!
    Braun Strowman's dumber than Lana's TikToks
    Instead of just shoes, this dork wears Crocs (Ew!)

    [Verse 2]
    Braun won't shut up about his hands and that's a fact
    This weirdo spent a whole damn year wearing a sheep mask (Why?)
    We're fixing to whoop his ass live on PPV
    Judo-kicking his kidneys so much that he pees

    [Pre-Chorus]
    Send him a tweet and let him know
    You want a new champ on the show

    [Chorus]
    Hey! Hey hey! Ho ho!
    The Universal Champion needs to go
    Hey! Hey hey!
    Braun wet the bed until he was six years old
    Hey! Hey hey! Ho ho!
    Braun Strowman's dumber than Lana's TikToks
    Instead of just shoes, this dork wears Crocs (Ew!)

    [Solo]
    Hey! (Hey)
    Ho! (Ho)
    Hey! (Hey)
    Ho! (Ho)
    Hey! (Hey)
    Ho! (Ho)

    [Bridge]
    Hey hey, ho ho
    Hey hey, ho ho, ho

    [Chorus]
    Hey! Hey hey! Ho ho!
    The Universal Champion needs to go
    Hey! Hey hey!
    Braun wet the bed until he was six years old
    Hey! Hey hey! Ho ho!
    Braun Strowman's dumber than Lana's TikToks
    Instead of just shoes, this dork wears Crocs (Ew!)

    [Outro]
    Hey! (Hey)
    Ho! (Ho)
    Hey! (Hey)
    Ho! (Ho)

    I haven't been 12 in 18 years, but these sophomoric jokes never get old. This can mean either of two things: that whoever wrote this shit really knew what they were doing or that I need to grow up. Pretty sure it's more of the former than the latter. I mean, the chorus focuses on Braun peeing the bed until he was six, which makes me snicker in glee because it's petty as fuck, and then Miz & Morrison hit even lower by taking potshots at Braun's (lack of) intelligence and Lana's TikToks. And the barb aimed at Crocs was the sweet cherry on top. That's some grade-A grade school trashtalk. Not to mention, they also openly question Braun's Wyatt Family roots and why he even had to wear a sheep mask for a year. Oo nga naman, why?

    What puts "Hey! Hey Hey." over big time is that it has a bridge. I've shat on many a theme song on this column for being a glorified five-minute loop. The team behind this song put some actual thought in composing this song and sticking to the 80s power ballad theme. You have to appreciate how cheesy the bridge is from the guitar solo to the montage of Miz & Morrison just pretending to play guitar, sparring, and just hamming it up. Musically, the solo itself isn't a mindblowing riff, but god damn, is it sexy. Plus, it builds to the last chorus, which shifts into a higher octave!

    The only thing missing towards the end was another go-round of the chorus, like most power ballads and pop songs from that era, which ran the climactic chorus at least twice towards the end to really reinforce the hook and embed it into your memory. No, seriously, that's precisely why hooks/choruses repeat several times over in a song!

    All in all, "Hey! Hey Hey." is a fun anthem and the music video doesn't really get old after several rewatches. You can see just how much fun Miz & Morrison are having in the video and it actually makes me jealous of the pure enjoyment these two adults get out of portraying two childish and petty villains on TV. If you've been having a horrible start to your week like most of us are having thanks to current events, then take three and a half minutes out of your day to watch the video and have some fun at Braun Strowman's expense. Not like he'd know a thing or two about empathy anyway.

    Header image from WWEMusic's YouTube channel

    *****


    Stan Sy (@_StanSy) is the Editor at Large of Smark Henry and is also a radio DJ on Wave 89.1, an events host, a freelance writer, and one of the hosts of The Smark Gilas-Pilipinas Podcast. He also used to be one of the hosts and writers of The Wrestling Gods on FOX. He enjoys watching WWE, AEW, and the occasional New Japan match. In fact, he promises to try following this year's New Japan Cup.
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    Item Reviewed: #ThemeSongTuesday: Hey! Hey Hey. Rating: 5 Reviewed By: Stan Sy
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