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    Tuesday, July 17, 2018

    #ThemeSongTuesday: "B" Stands For Battlescars

    Curtis Axel and Bo Dallas are RAW Tag Team Champions.

    Lord, I did not think I'd actually type that sentence on this site. Consider the fact that since The Miz was pulled away from The Miztourage during the Superstar Shakeup, it was Axel and Bo who ended up holding gold before Miz. In many ways, it's a testament to both members of The B-Team, who've kept their heads down and rolled with every gimmick that's come their way—however silly it's been.

    From being members of The Social Outcasts, to the Miztourage, to Axel's runs as a babyface, to Bo's "BO-LIEVE" schtick, to their current run as The B-Team, these two Superstars understood their roles on the card and delivered when their numbers were called. I'm glad that Axel and Bo are no longer just sentimental favorites around the Smark Henry Offices. They're pretty much fan favorites at this point, and their status as tag champions should somehow lend credence to that point. Whether or not this title reign will be a long and sustained one is a different story altogether. Regardless of how and when this ends, I'll just be happy it began to begin with.

    With that said, let's focus on The B-Team's music this week on #ThemeSongTuesday by reviewing their entrance theme, "Battlescars."

    Okay, first off, someone in CFO$ must have failed spelling because Merriam-Webster clearly spells it as a compound word with a space in between, like so: battle scar. Seriously, what is up with people being unable to separate words these days with the fucking space bar? It's "a lot," not "alot," "a bit" and not "abit," "pa rin" and not "parin." Get it together, people.

    Now, let's look at the lyrics.

    These battle scars! 
    Tear you apart 
    Eat you alive 
    Nothing on earth can stop us now! 
    Etched in our hearts 
    Sewn in our minds 
    These battle scars! 

    Hey! This must be the way! 
    The end of eras slip back into war 
    They! Cannot save face! 
    The ones who terrorize us keeping score 

    Now! You're all gonna pay! 
    Never satisfied, searchin' for more 
    Live! To see another day! 
    Break the silence, sacrifice it all
    "Battlescars" begins with a decent intro featuring some keys ominously being played, along with the bass drum building up to the drop. Then the vocalist yells, "THESE BATTLE SCARS!" and you've got what sounds a lot like a poor man's Papa Roach rocking out to lyrics that they think are so edgy, but actually aren't all that hardcore. I'd argue that Baron Corbin's current theme is more badass than this one—and that theme's pretty edgelord-y already.

    The B-Team's theme isn't all that bad, mind you. I actually like the guitar solo that serves as the interlude between the chorus and the verse. It's pretty catchy and I could LSS the fuck out of that all day before I eventually get tired of it and watch a G1 Climax match to cleanse my palate. I get what this song is trying to go for. They want to go hard and sound like punks, but for some reason, CFO$ must've forgotten that this shit got old 10 years ago.

    Like most CFO$ tracks, "Battlescars" is a loop that follows this familiar formula: chorus-verse 1-chorus-verse 2-repeat. The writers tried to shake things up by not sticking to a traditional ABAB rhyme within the verses, which is alright considering the screamo vocals rely more on the formation of the vowel sounds than the actual sounds of rhyming syllables. I'll give them that. 

    But when you strip away all the frills of the song, the message is pretty clear. The song is about someone who's been hardened by battles and wars and they're not going to let anyone get in their way this time. It's not bad because when you think about it, that's some babyface shit right there. It just isn't special, which is what we've all come to expect from the fastfood chain of wrestling themes in CFO$.

    What do you think of The B-Team and their ascent to the RAW Tag Team Championship? Do you even enjoy hearing "Battlescars" when it plays as they make their way to the ring? Sound off below while doing your best impression of The Deleters of Worlds!

    Images from WWE


    Stan Sy (@_StanSy) is the Editor at Large of Smark Henry, and is also a radio DJ on Wave 89.1, an events host, a freelance writer, and one of the hosts of The Smark Gilas-Pilipinas Podcast. He also used to be one of the hosts and writers of The Wrestling Gods on FOX. He enjoys watching WWE, NXTLucha Underground, and the occasional New Japan match. You can ask him questions about wrestling, Survivor (yes, the reality show), or whatever you like on his CuriousCat account.

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    Item Reviewed: #ThemeSongTuesday: "B" Stands For Battlescars Rating: 5 Reviewed By: Stan Sy
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