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    Saturday, June 17, 2017

    Money in the Bank RunDown: Ladies First

    Who's ready for some briefcase action? We're just days away from one of the most fun PPVs of the year in the form of Money in the Bank and this year's probably the most important one to date. Aside from the usual exciting main event, we will also witness the first-ever female MITB ladder match. If you're not hyped right now, you should question your entire existence. So, are you ready for some speculations? Let's get down to it!

    Money in the Bank Ladder Match: United States Champion Kevin Owens vs AJ Styles vs Baron Corbin vs Sami Zayn vs Shinsuke Nakamura vs Dolph Ziggler

    Alright, let's talk money. This year's Money in the Bank ladder match has arguably the best combination of competitors in the history of MITB matches. Any one of them could win the damn briefcase and it wouldn't cause an uproar amongst the smarks and casuals alike. I believe whoever wins this match will shape the main event in the future so he must be someone who is really worth pushing, and yeah, I believe all of them are.

    As fans, we can't lose here. AJ Styles and Shinsuke Nakamura are the clear favorites but both men don't really need the briefcase to boost their careers. It would make sense for Sami Zayn to grab the briefcase and eventually conquer the WWE as its champion, but Kevin Owens could add the briefcase to the list of accomplishments he will gladly boast in his promos (Chris Jericho pun not intended… perhaps). Dolph Ziggler could use a huge win to restart his journey back to the main event scene, while Baron Corbin could also use this as his own golden ticket to become SmackDown Live's top monster heel. The possibilities are endless!

    Who will walk out as Mr. Money in the Bank? 

    I mentioned two weeks ago how I would want to see either Dolph Ziggler or Baron Corbin walk out with the briefcase. While I'm still high on Corbin, I'd like to switch Ziggler with Sami Zayn. It’s been a while since we had an underdog for a briefcase holder and I think Zayn is the right guy for the job. So my two picks are Corbin and Zayn, but if I really have to pick just one, I’ll place my money on Baron Corbin. He’s the most likely to win the briefcase anyway, so it would be safe to bet on him. Can you imagine him holding the briefcase in the coming weeks? Or maybe he’ll cash it in on the same day and save us all from Jinder Mahal? That would be awesome!

    Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Charlotte vs Natalya vs Becky Lynch vs Carmella vs Tamina

    Alright, let's talk money, ageyn. This historic matchup is definitely huge and I’m glad the women of SmackDown Live got the privilege to participate in it. Imagine if RAW did it first, would you really want to see Nia Jax ruin an MITB match? 

    Kidding aside, I’m still hyped for this one despite my doubts on multi-women matches in the past. Let’s hope they don’t get crazy with the spots, you know? So who should win this one? Just like their male counterparts, any one of our femme fatales could grab the briefcase with no ill implications. Will they go for the crowd favorite Charlotte Flair? Will they let Becky Lynch grab another first for her career? Will they shock us by letting Tamina win? And what about Natalya and Carmella? Unlike their male counterparts, I have one definitive answer.

    Who will walk out as the first-ever Ms. Money in the Bank? 

    I think Becky Lynch should be the first woman to win the briefcase. I was still undecided about this one for a while now but after watching a WhatCulture video, I’m convinced that Becky should win on Monday (Manila Time). 

    I don’t necessarily want her to turn heel, though. Babyfaces can still cash in the briefcase when the champion is down and out (see: Dean Ambrose) so I don’t think her image as the brand’s top babyface will be ruined when she eventually cashes it in to Naomi. Besides, it’s just awesome to see Becky win something. Straight Fire all the way!

    Edit: There are rumors that Maria Kanellis-Bennett will be added to the match. Um, okay, I guess. The more, the merrier, as they say. Not really hyped about it.

    WWE Championship Match: Randy Orton vs Jinder Mahal (c)

    Oh boy, here we go again. If you’re an avid reader of my recent SmackDown Live reviews, you already know how I feel about Jinder Mahal being an absolute joke as a champion. 

    I can’t express fully in a short paragraph the extent of my complaints with how they handled the rise of Jinder (or as I call it, the Great Jinderfication). I could probably make an entire column just talking about it, but then I realized that I have a life to attend to and I’m still figuring out how to be a responsible adult, so there’s bigger things to worry about. Let’s just agree (or not, since I’m like the only one in here who’s not on the Jinder hype train) that Jinder’s current run as the WWE Champion has been a steaming flop. The way he lazily presents himself in the ring is also insulting. Who gives a shit if you’re bulked up? It’s hard to take someone seriously when they grumble every word they say. 

    Seriously, Jinder is like living a live action Snicker commercial except someone forgot to hand him the chocolate bar so he’s still hungry and therefore, not himself. This is the guy you chose to represent the WWE? Seriously?

    Who will walk out as the WWE Champion? 

    Of course I want Orton to regain his title so we can start the process of resetting the prestige of the WWE Championship, but we all know that won’t be the case. It’s all about the money, y’all, and I can clearly see Jinder Mahal retaining on Monday via shenanigans or a screwy DQ finish. 

    It doesn’t help that Orton is the hometown hero, and we all know how hometown heroes are being treated nowadays. So yeah, fuck this match. We have the embodiment of a business move as the champion, and isn’t that why we hated John Cena in the first place? Isn’t that why we’re hating on Roman Reigns now?

    SmackDown Women's Championship: Lana vs Naomi (c)

    I don't really get why everyone's hating on Lana getting a title shot on her debut one-on-one match. I'm not saying that she deserved it or anything, although she's clearly over with the fans. The Queen of Shimmy got a title shot because Naomi has to be in a PPV match somehow and since all active superstars are already in the MITB match, it just makes sense. 

    Do you really want to trust Lana with a ladder in her debut match? She’s pretty much an NXT talent walking with the big leagues so yeah, it’s a good move that she wasn’t added to the ladder match. Besides, this is the land of opportunity, remember? We’re living in a reality where a former jobber became WWE Champion so I don’t see why we can’t give this nice lady a damn title shot.

    Who will snatch the title come MITB? 

    Again, calm your horses, people. Of course Lana won’t win the title in her debut match. Naomi will school her with the power of glow as she retains her SmackDown Women’s Championship. 

    Now I’m not really sure where Lana goes from here but hey, if she does well in her debut match, I’m sure Creative can find something for her. Consider this a make-or-break situation for our resident ravishing Superstar. Or you know, they might let her win the title to capitalize on the booming market of women with fake Russian accents. I don’t really know how it works anymore.

    SmackDown Tag Team Championship: New Day vs The Usos (c)

    We will finally see the Uso Penitentiary in action against veteran tag team title holders New Day and I’ve got to say, they wasted an opportunity to build up the Usos as the top heel in a tag team division lacking of one. Instead, we have a cool heel tag team that’s all talk and no bite when they could’ve been SmackDown Live’s own version of the Revival with the Samoan attitude. 

    It’s easy to predict the victory of the New Day but we have to consider how the return of Hype Bros will affect the tag title scene. But then again, maybe one of the Hype Bros will turn on each other some time in the near future, so yeah, I think New Day’s got this one in the bag.

    Who will walk out with the tag titles? 

    This one’s easy: New Day all the way. I think if Creative really wanted to go all in on the Usos as the top heel tag team, they should’ve pulled the trigger weeks ago by brutalizing either the New Day or Breezango. It makes sense, since they always brag about them being the cause of paranoia. Besides, we gots to make merch money, yo.

    Kickoff Match: Hype Bros vs The Colons

    No one cares about the Colons. The Hype Bros will probably pick up the victory in this one. Welcome back, Zack Ryder!

    The real question we have to ask is who attacked Tyler Breeze and trashed their fashion police office? We have three teams we can investigate. 

    The Hype Bros just returned so they’re off the hook. Now we’re left with the Ascension and American Alpha. Although it’s more likely the Ascension, wouldn’t be awesome to have the Alphas turn heel? Maybe then they will truly develop a solid following amongst the WWE universe. That’s just wishful thinking. I do hope a reveal will happen at the PPV itself. Just a short Fashion Files segment will do.


    So how about it? Do you agree or disagree? Who are your bets for this year’s Money in the Bank PPV? Feel free to fight me over the whole Jinder Mahal fiasco at the comments below.

    Ricky Jay Publico (@NitPickRick) is a wrestling fan who enjoys watching high flyers and brawlers battle it out in the ring. A known Botchamania binge-watcher, he claims to have memorized the chronological order of Royal Rumble winners, but fails to remember who won in 2004. He writes stories about life and nonsense.
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    Item Reviewed: Money in the Bank RunDown: Ladies First Rating: 5 Reviewed By: Ricky Jay Publico
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