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    Tuesday, June 14, 2016

    #ThemeSongTuesday (6/14/16): The Namesake

    Mark Henry turned 45 yesterday, and he still lifts things thrice your weight to relieve boredom. We don’t have concrete proof of this, since Mark Henry lifted that slab of concrete and threw it to the neighboring galaxy, but it’s most likely true. As a belated birthday gift to the man who not only puts the “Mark Henry” in Smark Henry, but also has won more medals for weightlifting than our entire staff combined, let’s have a listen to his theme song:

    If you’re tasked with writing a theme song for someone they call “The World’s Strongest Man”, you want badass. You want dominance. You want power. Three 6 Mafia captured the physically imposing air that flows through Mark Henry with a heavy stomping beat and a simple, yet effective hook:

    Henry lyrics.png
    Yo! That's terrifying.

    “Some Bodies Gonna Get It” has served Mark Henry as his primary singles theme song for a solid decade now and throughout those 10 years, nobody’s really brought a theme that fit him as well as this does. That title isn’t a case of bad grammar or urban language, either. When discussing the destructive capabilities of Mark Henry, you best be dealing in plural nouns. Bodies are gonna get it.

    Awash in a sea of cookie cutter themes produced in-house, Mark Henry sticks out like a sexy sore thumb by keeping a theme written and performed by Academy Award-winning rap group Three 6 Mafia. Why shouldn’t he, though? The World’s Strongest Man was setting records and lifting weights close to a ton by the time he was 24. I’m 22 and sometimes I get tired running upstairs to grab something I forgot.

    Belated happy birthday, Mark Henry! Not only would our memories of pro wrestling growing up not be the same without you, we’d probably have a less impressive name for this website. So in honor of your numerous accolades for lifting abnormally heavy things over the course of your career, we give you 900 pound cakes. Try not to lift them all at once, alright?


    When he isn't writing Smark Henry's #ThemeSongTuesday column, Lorenzo Magnaye hosts the #HomeRun on 99.5 PlayFM. It's a good thing, too, since his childhood consisted mostly of watching professional wrestling and listening to his parents on the radio. He's only recently rekindled his love for the WWE, and has been trying to make up for missing out on everything post-WrestleMania XX by praying to Seth Rollins thrice a day. Follow him on Twitter: @RenzoSaurus!
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